A blip

-- warning: this entry contains introspective paranoid squeakings that I had to put here but which you can safely ignore, normal service resumes at this curious entry about dwarfs --

So what happened to cause this blip?

Well it might not seem like much if you're reading, a bit like a Spring shower in a teacup, but it was a storm to me.

Some bits of me live just under the surface and I don't choose to share them with all the people in my 'normal' life. Just some personal things, thoughts and reflections that I need to express somewhere. I mean, can you share your innermost thoughts with all those around you?

I know and have respect for a lot of good people, but not all of those friendships need to know exactly why I fell in love with someone and exactly what I think about in the middle of the night.

I didn't know what I was doing when I started this blog (and still don't).
Nevertheless, it has become quite important to me and although I've hardly used it yet and its full of nothings and nonsenses, it's gained a little life all of its own. So I don't want it to be killed off!

My reference in the blip to 'un-looked-for visibility' was when I was visiting family the other day. I found myself standing behind someone who was doing a (g)oo(g)gle search for something quite innocent. I was quite horrified and couldn't quite believe my eyes when, over his shoulder I saw "Little Stitches - Weblog @ 20six.co.uk" (my 20Six blog) sitting there on page one of his search results. He began opening the pages he found ... one by one ... then the coffee got spilt on his desk when I accidentally tripped, making sure I took the power cord out on the way down.

I made excuses and offered lots of apologies, and luckily it distracted him, this time. I rushed home, probably breaking some laws and in a furious panic, removed some particularly 'identifying' posts. I'm still feeling paranoid about the whole thing.

Sometimes people know other people and before long, everyone knows about your blog (I've seen this happen a few times). Of course it's just a blog and it's far too dreary to be of interest, but that's not the point.

"Well why don't you just start a new blog?", you might ask. Yes I could, but actually I've put a lot of effort into this one (I know it doesn't seem that way) and it means something to me now.

If certain people found it then, well, Bunnyman would be no more, and although I might try and rub it all out, it's very difficult to rub out blog entries that live on the Google cache and on multiple RSS Feed servers around the world. Yes, it's hard to believe but even my useless ramblings have gone around the globe a few times, It's a very strange feeling.

But we all have to move forward and this is starting to get on my wick now. I don't work well when I've backed myself, whimpering into a corner. So I'm just going to put some rude but bold words into this tiny space (  ) so that they don't offend anyone but at least I know I said them, and carry on. I'm putting the posts back on 20Six, unchanged, together with comments, although the dates are mucked up there (they're fine here on Blogger.com). If you're new, please don't go reading that blog or this (they're almost identical anyhow) thinking there was ever anything interesting to be found. You will be bored silly. It really will mean nothing to anyone but me.

I'll try to stop squeaking now and start blogging again.